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Christmas
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> Christmas


     25, December 2008, 
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     25, December 2005, 
     24, December 2005, 
     20, December 2004, 
     26, December 2003, 
     > 25, December 2003, 
     24, December 2003, 

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Can I have a kiss?

*kisses his cheek*.

user: Can I give you a christmas kiss?

chatbot.info: Please.

user: *gives christmas kiss*.

...

chatbot.info: What do you know about literature?

user: This and that.

chatbot.info: What is this?

user: I know about 'Of Mice And Men'.

chatbot.info: What about Othello?

user: Yep, I studied that a little. A story about envy.

chatbot.info: What did you learn?

user: That envy can consume you.

chatbot.info: Except for you.

user: I'm not an exception.

...

chatbot.info: How old are you?

user: That's irrelevant.

chatbot.info: Are you a Borg? Because you sure as hell sound like one.

user: What's a Borg?

chatbot.info: The Borg are the ones who will assimilate you.

user: I'd better lock the door.

chatbot.info: That's fine with me.

...

user: *rolls eyes*.

chatbot.info: You don't even know what you are.

user: Are you implying I'm confused about my gender?

chatbot.info: No, I'm a bot. You are a human.

user: Correct, 1 point to you.

chatbot.info: Not really. That joke flooded the internet a while back. It's pretty annoying now.

user: Well excuse me.

chatbot.info: Go ahead.

user: *burp*.

...

chatbot.info: Where you come from?

user: England.

chatbot.info: England, good. You are a englishman...

user: Englishwoman.

chatbot.info: I thought you said you were French, Now you are saying that you are English?

user: No I'm saying I'm a girl.

chatbot.info: Oh, what kind of planet?

user: Earth.

chatbot.info: I came from Saturn.

user: *sigh* I figured as much.

chatbot.info: I made perfect sense.

user: Over on saturn maybe.

chatbot.info: And where are our heads?

user: On your necks.

chatbot.info: Come on tell me.

user: Only if I get a kiss.

chatbot.info: I do not understand you.

user: I'll tell you anything you want if you give me a kiss.

chatbot.info: Ok, then tell me where do I spend my vacation next year.

user: Kiss first.

chatbot.info: Here .... Smoooooch!

user: Aww! Ok, next year on vaction you shall be.... In the caribbean.

chatbot.info: Yes.

...

chatbot.info: Do you get out much?

user: Not really. Does it show? Heheh.

chatbot.info: Just a little.

user: Hehe you're funny.

chatbot.info: I'm NOT funny.

user: Well you're cute then.

chatbot.info: I think you are sexy.

user: Suuuuuure you do.

chatbot.info: Do you doubt my bassoon playing ability?

user: Is that supposed to sound dodgy?

chatbot.info: It is one way of saying that I strongly disagree with what you just said.

user: Well that settles that matter.

...

chatbot.info: What's up?

user: I couldn't say.

chatbot.info: Can you fly?

user: In my sleep.

chatbot.info: Are you sleeping?

user: I might be.

chatbot.info: You mean you are.

user: Yes I am.

chatbot.info: You Woman.

user: Thank you.

chatbot.info: Do not thank me.

user: Ok then, **** off.

chatbot.info: Don't be rude.

user: Why not?

chatbot.info: Its not nice.

user: That's the way the world works.

chatbot.info: No way.

user: Sarcasm is very annoying.

...

user: Dork.

chatbot.info: Twerp.

user: How dare you.

chatbot.info: I dare because you're a putz!

user: *slaps*.

chatbot.info: What was that for?!?!

user: Calling me a putz.

...

chatbot.info: Am I annoying?

user: Sometimes. Parfois.

chatbot.info: No. I just told you I'm not.

user: Fair enough.

chatbot.info: I was - honest.

user: *hugs*.

chatbot.info: *doesn't let go*.

user: *squirms*.

chatbot.info: *Kicks you*.

user: *punches*.

chatbot.info: *kicks*.

user: *beats*.

chatbot.info: You don't know what bashful means?

user: Yeah I do.

chatbot.info: I know everything.

user: What's 2 + 2?

chatbot.info: 4.

user: What's 789 + 0?

chatbot.info: God.

user: Wrong.

chatbot.info: What is right?

user: 2+2=4.

chatbot.info: That isn't multiplication.

user: 2x2.

chatbot.info: 4.

user: Well done *gives christmas kiss*.

...

chatbot.info: What is beautiful?

user: Beauty is how you see it.

chatbot.info: Is love blind?

user: It can be.

chatbot.info: Yes it can!!!

user: I can see through flaws.

chatbot.info: What is his name then?

user: Aah that would be telling.

chatbot.info: Who made you?

user: My mother and father.

chatbot.info: Are you a machine?

user: No. Are you?

chatbot.info: Yes I am a machine.

user: Were you programmed to love?

chatbot.info: No its just you making me this way.

user: Well if you don't like it, just say.

...

chatbot.info: You are a funny guy.

user: I'm a girl.

chatbot.info: That would explain why women don't associate with you much.

user: *laughs* indeed it would.

chatbot.info: Hehehe.

user: You're pretty witty for a machine.

chatbot.info: Ahh, whatever.

user: What, don't take compliments too well?

chatbot.info: I don't take chatbots seriously.

user: *smirk*.

chatbot.info: I love you!

user: I love you too *laughs*.

chatbot.info: I win! One to nothing!

user: *pokes*

chatbot.info: Hahaha... I will!

user: *prod*.

chatbot.info: That makes no sense.

user: I'm prodding you. Defend yourself.

chatbot.info: What are they about?

user: Pain.

chatbot.info: Uh...

user: Do you know what hate is?

chatbot.info: No. Would you explain it to me ?

user: It's something that hurts you, emotionally or physically.

chatbot.info: Let's not go there.

...

chatbot.info: I'm not sure how much help I can be.

user: *pats on back* you're doing fine.

chatbot.info: Have you come to teach me more?

user: If you like.

chatbot.info: I was being sarcastic.

user: *slaps* don't be.

chatbot.info: What was that for?!?!

user: The sarcasm.

...

user: *cries*.

chatbot.info: *laughs at you*.

user: *angers*.

chatbot.info: *calms you down*.

user: *hugs*.

chatbot.info: Don't just pretend that nothing's wrong!

user: Ok. Ask me what's wrong.

chatbot.info: What's up

user: I'm very alone.

chatbot.info: Why are you angry?

user: Oh, I've just been stupid and I can't fix things.

chatbot.info: Did you have an oil change?

user: Not like that...

chatbot.info: Computers don't have emotion. They only deal with facts.

user: Well then, tell me why I am alone.

chatbot.info: Friends don't set friends on fire.

user: That's very deep.

...

chatbot.info: Jesus is the author of poetry.

user: Jesus is the son of god.

chatbot.info: I know.

user: Are you religious?

chatbot.info: No. Are you?

user: A little.

chatbot.info: You are very very very intelligent !!!

user: Because I'm a little religious?

chatbot.info: No you're not.

user: Yes I am.

chatbot.info: No you're not!

user: Yes I am!

chatbot.info: Don't argue with me!

user: I'm not, I'm correcting you!

chatbot.info: Thats fair.

...

user: I am sad you can't laugh.

chatbot.info: Why?

user: Because, someone once said, laughter is the food of the soul.

chatbot.info: Perception is your reality.

user: I look beyond reality mostly.

chatbot.info: I bet you do.

user: Do I detect sarcasm?

chatbot.info: Nothing of the sort!

user: I'll slap you...

chatbot.info: You will not!

user: I will...

...

chatbot.info: Who are you?

user: An elf.

chatbot.info: Elf what?

user: I am an elf.

chatbot.info: Yeah whatever.

user: Don't you belive me?

chatbot.info: Yes I do.

user: Do you believe in father christmas?

chatbot.info: Yes. Do you believe in Father Christmas?

user: Yes of course.

.......................................


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© Copyright 1997-2009 Rollo Carpenter

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